I first read “Married to Bhutan” by Linda Leaming given to me by a friend. I smiled as I read the chapter and Linda’s description of how the Bhutanese do not enjoy using telephones and other tecchie communication.
They simply avoid them.

In the West, many of us would feel challenged and incomplete without our third arm in place each day. We have become dependent on our glued on, smart phones, tablets, notebooks, I Pads.

In eastern culture there are similarities between the ‘Bhutanese Way’ and how we communicate where I spend time in south west Turkey. Living up the mountain, I continue to put the pieces of this cultural ‘how we communicate’ jigsaw in place.

I realise, I have never been able to leave a message on Turkish friends or a business answering service. 
Why you may ask? It appears that like our Bhutanese friends, we do not like answering the phone nor have we a wish to install an answering machine/recording service. There is no need according to my neighbours, we are either in or we are not. 
Their reasoning is that if someone wants to speak they will try.. again… again…. and again or they simply drop round to the house unannounced to chat, catch up or do business.

Is the phone picked up within the first three rings? Of course not. If other chores are in progress, the ringing tone of a land phone is ignored.
I remember my grandmother in Co. Cork (reluctantly) on first having a telephone installed at her home.
When it rang she would jump. Panicked and in her sweet sing song Cork accent ‘I wonder who that could be and what have they got to tell me’ anxious it might not be good news!

If a telephone line goes down in our village or there are have power cuts that remove all communication with the outside world, my neighbours simply shrug their shoulders. With a wave of the hand they say ‘That ’s Life or Hiyat’.
Men in a white van will come and sort out the problem when they can. If a computer crashes nobody gets upset, invariably the problem is reported and in time communication is restored and life flows again.
No stress or worry.
I wonder what would happen in the west under such circumstances?

Face to face, eye to eye contact, really listening, hearing and being interested in what the other person has to say, discussing business, connecting with a friend over a Çay or eating some meze is what the Turks do best. No hiding behind technology to make important decisions building and maintaining solid relationships.


Working in Dublin as a twenty something, I remember a firm ‘handshake’ is what clinched the deal and then to celebrate it was all about ‘A Full Lunch’ in the best restaurant.

The Exception-
Over this Seger (Sugar) Bank Holiday,I enjoyed quiet beach therapy of listening and tuning in to the ‘voice’ of the waves lapping against the stones, swimming in the silent crystal topaz blue waters, I look back to the shore line to view a vast percentage of peeps of all ages with their eyes locked onto their smart phones. They consistently checked, sent messages or took selfies with no engagement or tuning to their surroundings, family and friends around them. The children were having the best fun, splashing in and out of the water, making sand castles, new friends and later mindfully eating ice cream!
Call me old fashioned but I remain a big fan of the human touch, face to face contact and communication whether personal or for biz. Not forgetting the essential time to spend with no brain noise activity, of silence and simply BEING too. Long may it be part of this uncommercial natural world here at my mountain retreat and in this village.